When tech companies encourage employees to be role models of diversity, they may unwittingly be undermining their self-care and desire for inclusion, by focusing only on what makes them different. Even though diversity initiatives may be well-intentioned, highlighting only differences can impact self-care in a profound way, if people don’t first see their differences as positives. In this talk, I'll explain why companies should focus on achieving inclusion first, attending to employees’ specific self-care needs in order to create a platform for diversity to flourish.